Do You Believe In Love At First Sight?
Men and women can feel strong attraction when they least expect it. When you see someone attractive without knowing them fully, you can feel instantly drawn to that person. Even though you may fall in love with someone, cultivating a healthy long term relationship is the bigger challenge here if that is your goal.
Men and women love feeling attractive and being with attractive people. It’s enticing. It declares status and worthiness on a deeper level. People may experience love at first sight, but not pursue someone because of self confidence issues or the simple fact that he or she wants to avoid rejection altogether. People want to avoid hurt and suffering. We all seek to find pleasure over pain in any situation.
Science is powerful. Our brain releases oxytocin, the “love hormone,” when we connect with someone. It also affects how we bond with someone. Eharmony has an interesting article called, “Is it possible to fall in love at first sight?” by Isabel Thottam that in it states, “Moreover, scientists report that all humans are genetically wired to be able to fall in love at first sight–it just doesn’t happen for some people.” This means that we are all subject to falling in love without any notice.
Love at first sight is real. An article published in 2018 by the Psychology Today website called “Is Love at First Sight Real?” by Theresa DiDonato, Ph.D talks about five things that were learned during a 2017 study. The first is love at first sight isn’t just biased memory. The second is you’re more likely to feel love at first sight with beautiful people. The third is men report love at first sight more than women. The fourth is love at first sight isn’t usually mutual. The fifth is love at first sight isn’t really “love.” We can feel strong initial attractions with love at first sight, but making it last is the challenge.
It can be fun to explore the idea of love at first sight. If you want to connect with someone on a whim, understand that you still want to get to know the person to see if there is a connection that will last. You’ve seen only a snapshot of this person in his or her current life. It’s important to do some more research and get in touch with this person some more. What is the story of his or her life? What is he or she like in daily life? What are his or her goals? Is there any matching interests, hobbies or likes/dislikes? Understanding that attraction is only one facet of a successful relationship will help you stay in reality.
Sometimes attraction is strong and will have you doing things that you may otherwise not be doing. We may put someone on a pedestal and constantly seek love and attention from this person as an outward extension of what we want to be. Being closer to this person may bring a sort of boost to our perceived status or self worth. We may change parts of ourselves or what we are doing to be received well in the eyes of the man or woman.
We all as humans have the ability to experience love at first sight. Some people may chase after the feeling that oxytocin gives us and go above and beyond to do “stupid things” to acquire this feeling. They may change themselves, buy expensive gifts to feel love from someone or continually bombard someone with phone calls or text messages. Feelings can be powerful and if we haven’t learned to acquire a sense of a good feeling about ourselves, we will go outward to try to find this feeling in someone else.
Being centered in ourselves and approaching love with a sense of realism will help you to not get carried away and find yourself severely out of balance. Love at first sight and deep, committed love in a relationship are different. It is normal to feel love at first sight. Understanding what will bring you together with someone looking at each of your needs, boundaries, agreements, interests, hobbies and likes is a healthy way to cultivate a long term relationship rather than only relying on the feeling of attraction to guide you.
