Fast Or Slow: Which Speed Is Right To Go In A Relationship?

Sara Knick
3 min readNov 6, 2020

Some people are scared of going too fast and ruining a relationship. Some people can’t take going too slow either. In one relationship, I was dating someone and he was very adamant about not being in a relationship. He had fears of “being trapped,” bored and having a general lack of freedom.

For the most part, people want to feel loved and gain support from a relationship, but the partner on the other side may have qualms stemming from previous bad experiences or fears in general. When you like someone and want to just be with that person, but he or she isn’t putting themselves “all in,” it can be hurtful, embarrassing and confusing.

Fear is powerful sometimes. It can hold us back from amazing experiences. It can block us from creating the partnership that we’ve always wanted. It can make us want to be careful and go slower so that we can catch if anything seems off. The opposite may also be true. We may want to reach a specific love goal in our lives and go faster in a relationship for fear that we may never have another relationship again or miss an opportunity of reaching our love goal.