How Do I Ask Someone Out?

My personality changed and morphed over the years from being quiet and reserved to being more outgoing and bold. I approached dating in a way that was adventurous and fun. I wanted to get to know more about the person either by text or on the phone.

I wanted the guy to ask me out first. I didn’t feel special if I wasn’t being pursued.

I wouldn’t get asked out as much as I wanted. I fixated on the fact that a lot of guys didn’t see how special I was. What was wrong with them?

I realized that guys can go through difficult times in their lives, too. They also have different energies that may not be the best suited for ours. When we are growing up, we get told the story of a knight in shining armor coming to save and protect us. When he doesn’t get here fast enough, we feel unloved. This is how I felt.

I studied astrology and energies. I had crafted a dream board of the man that I wanted to meet. I would search for the guy’s birthdate to understand his baseline of energy. I considered many factors in deciding if he was even right for me. I looked for him to show interest in me and see if he would proceed further. I did not pounce and try to make a guy mine. I looked for love that felt free flowing and exciting. I did not exert a lot of energy to keep a guy in my midst.

I did get a lot more offers from guys to want to hang out with me. I would decline a lot of these offers because I either didn’t feel comfortable with the guy, didn’t know his true intentions and/or I was busy. I had a lot of choices.

I looked for the guy to ask me first if he wanted to take me on a date. This showed that he was putting effort into getting to know me. I liked being given attention at the time and I wanted to know if a guy was interested enough to put in the effort.

The way that I went about dating in this way worked for me. I liked being pursued over me pursuing the man. I wanted to be reassured that I was on the guy’s mind. I wanted to know that I meant something. The way that I approached dating helped me to set up what I wanted later on in my current relationship.