How Do You Tell If A Man Likes You Or Just Wants To Sleep With You?

I seemed to be really good at figuring out a guy’s motives without it explicitly being said or known. I figured out a lot when I had to navigate through the dating world alone. I was good-hearted and still am. I liked to wear my heart on my sleeve.

I desired authenticity and candidness from the guy that I was interested in, but I still found myself involved in games of finding out whether or not what he was saying was true. I felt exasperated. This would be so much simpler if everyone involved just were who they were and got in touch with their feelings and would be open to their thoughts. If it wasn’t meant to be then it wasn’t meant to be.

I found out that months into an unlabelled relationship, one of the guys that I had been involved with got coached from a pickup artist. I was surprised he told me this later on when we were dating… maybe it was a confession because he was guilty of it… maybe he was proud of it.

I realized that I still had good intentions meeting guys. I was more aware and I was more insightful. I wasn’t trying to use guys. I had the right energy in my search for love.

I asked more questions. I tried to find the motives of why guys wanted to meet me. If they were only focused on my looks, how great the pictures of myself were and they were engaging in sexual dialogue straight away, I knew mainly that guy’s intentions were to just sleep with me. If a guy liked me, we would talk about matching interests and a variety of topics without rushing. I felt when a guy was rushing me to fit into his schedule then I would stop talking to him immediately. I looked to be approached with the right energy at the start of us talking.

Sometimes the right energy would be there at the start of a relationship, but I realized that there were red flags later on in which I had to leave the relationship because of the guy’s issues.

I continued to gravitate towards the right energy right at the beginning of meeting a guy or talking to him. If the energy changed to a more negative one or we realized we had differing life goals, I did not stay.

I feel that individuals and relationships are each dynamic in themselves. I did the best job that I could to find out what a guy’s motives were and then decide whether I wanted to continue communicating and being in touch with this guy. I knew that I had control and choice over my future. This was empowering and I never let anyone make me think any differently.