Is Dating Someone Considered A Relationship?

Let me tell you a story…

When I wasn’t too savvy in the world of love, dating and relationships, I had to do what I thought was right. I didn’t know exactly what things meant or what terms to use. I would just do what I wanted to do or do what felt good to me.

I desired to be in control of my destiny in love. I wanted to know exactly what would end up happening when I would meet someone, but I knew that there was no exact guarantee of the end result unless I would invest some time to know about my potential partner. I felt that there were so many vast opportunities and potential out there. I was fearful of my relationships going wrong or bad when I least expected it. I struggled with opening myself up and being vulnerable in the dating world.

In my twenties, I would publicly declare on my dating profiles that I was looking for a relationship. I remember when I was talking to guys that they seemed very non-committal and would tell me that “whatever happens happens.” I felt very lost. I was a good person, why wouldn’t someone want to be with me?

I realized that every person has their own motive in the dating world. Even though the person may not make it known what their motive is outright, I figured out that it’s always paying attention to someone’s actions over their words that is important in the love, dating and relationship arena.

I became more cautious and aware as my experience grew in online dating. I would ask to talk to guys on the phone to screen them and see if they were even confident enough to talk to me. Some were, some gave excuses. I would also make sure to meet in public places. I tried to be honest and transparent about my life with them.

There were a lot of times when I felt that the guys were still hiding me or hiding things about themselves. Even though I was being honest and transparent, I wasn’t getting the same treatment from them.

In the dating world, I have found that you will find people that will want different things. One guy didn’t want a relationship. Another guy just wanted to have fun and date. Yet another guy didn’t even use the word “date” in wanting to meet up. There is no “one size fits all” description in the world of love, dating and relationships.

I knew that I had a lot to tackle still and that I had to check in frequently into my emotional state so that I was energized and motivated to continue in the journey of love. I knew that the labels didn’t matter so much… “boyfriend,” “fiancé,” “relationship,” “dating,” “engaged”… what matters is how I ultimately felt and if I wanted to continue spending time with someone.

Commitment is a key factor in a relationship that makes a quality connection. Dating is spending time to get to know someone to see if you would like to partner with that person in the future. Underneath all of these labels and terms, what matters is if we desire to spend time with a specific partner and develop a meaningful relationship with him or her.