What Is Dating?

In my time of dating, I’ve dealt with different personality types. Some guys had hidden motives. Some guys were more self centered. Some guys had a general inability to trust making it hard to create a connection with them. Each guy had his good and bad qualities mixed in.

The objective in dating is to learn more about someone to then keep seeing him or her again because you enjoy that person, their thoughts and the time you spend with each other. It is pretty simple… so what makes it complicated? There may not be clarity in what will happen in the future. Each person may have his or her own idea of what will happen. The person that you may be dealing with could be a narcissistic personality. Sometimes men and women may be with a mate to fill any of a number of voids to make him or her feel good. For example, if someone suffers from a lack of self confidence, she could be with a guy to boost it.

Dealing with breakups in dating can be hurtful for the person that was dumped, but also for the person that decided to break up. It can be hurtful for both sides. You will have to deal with breakups at some point in time unless you plan on staying with your high school sweetheart and your relationship is so strong that you never break up and you’ve never been with anybody else. You may experience depression or anxiety and not cope with it well.

Dating is part of the journey to finding the one for you. It should be treated as an adventure with no attachment to the outcome. People are people. We change our minds. We sometimes lack clarity in our own direction.

Loveisrespect.org mentions that all partners should agree on a definition and lists questions to ask yourself so that you are being steered in the right direction.

There may be clashes at times in getting to know someone new. There will be new experiences. You haven’t known the person all of your life (maybe you have, but there are probably things you didn’t know that you may learn about the person). He or she may respond differently than you would to the same situations. You will probably not agree on everything.

When you separate people, they are individuals. When you put two people together, you will have two individuals in a unique relationship. Sometimes you do not see everything at first when you start dating someone. You can’t see all of the challenges, victories, disappointments, emotional scars and everything else that comes with someone just by looking at him or her.

Being patient with yourself and the other person will help ease anxiety or restlessness. Open and honest communication is best. Even if the other person chooses not to be open and honest, you can still have peace of mind about staying true to your ideas, motives and goals. Using mindfulness with yourself and as you interact with a new mate in dating situations will allow you to give yourself time to think and to be present with the other person. Giving yourself time to think and to process new situations is the greatest gift that you can give yourself when dating.