Why Growing Up As A Tomboy Gave Me A Different Perspective On Love

I wasn’t allowed to have makeup. Only if I was doing theatre and I was required to have makeup was it allowed. I preferred to wear pants. I did not like skirts. I liked playing games and doing things.

I wanted to see what it would be like to be the popular girl for once, but I knew that I did not have a natural inclination to be with the cool kids. I felt very different and hanging out with kids my own age was a chore. It was all about superficial talk. I was bored to death over talking about things that I did not care about. Getting a guy’s attention was the last thing on my list.

When I was younger, I had played hockey with the boys on my street sometimes. I was almost invited to play basketball, but one of the other boys didn’t allow me so I was blacklisted. One time the guy that I liked took my glasses off of my face and threw it into a large area of trees on my street and I was really scared to tell my mom about it.

I liked that I could get to know guys on an authentic level. I wasn’t trying. I wasn’t spending hours of my time in the mirror putting on makeup. I was taught that hard work and education is important. I was forced to find my interests on a very pure level, not on a superficial one.

I found out things I enjoyed. I liked making jewelry, writing, photography, drawing and art. I put time towards those things. I also put time towards my homework.

I knew that I was not looked at as being attractive. This was very hurtful and made me very upset and angry. When I got a comment on how good I looked from a nerdy guy, I got extremely upset and embarrassed.

The lesson that I learned here is that I learned not to use fashion and makeup as a crutch for interests, knowledge and values. I learned that it was not as important to make myself appealing to get the attention of a male. In this way, I learned self love on a very deep scale and had to figure out who I was. Love is not a substitute for what we are lacking.

I learned to deal with my emotions. I learned to use my resources wisely. I learned to become intelligent and savvy. I developed character and became the person that I am today.